What happens to your kids when you have to move?

boy at chalkboard doing math formulas and scratching headMany parents who are required to move to keep their jobs or start a new one and are concerned about their kids needing to change schools. Just before Thanksgiving our neighbors just faced that decision. They had kids in elementary, middle and a high school freshman who was the starting quarterback. They called a family meeting and announced that Daddy had a new job offer in Florida, before they could finish the sentence the kids screamed in unison, “Yea, yea! I always wanted to live in Florida.” They sold their house in a week, and moved away the following week. We miss them.

Now, not all moves go that well. Our president-elect faces a similar challenge. He and his wife have made plans different than our neighbors. Their grade school son will continue in his present school in New York until summer and then move to the White House. The First Lady plans to divide her time between D.C. and New York until then.

Many of the kids I see who are volunteering for military service have spent the last year of high school living with a friend because they and their parents didn’t want the poor kids to move during the school year.

Both of these approaches are rather popular, but not the one I usually recommend.

When a school kid moves at the beginning of the summer they have little opportunity to make friends and soon grow lonesome for their old friends. If they move during the school year they will have friends by the end of the first day and “buddies” by the end of the first week. And, because they most likely will have cell phones they’ll have more friends than ever before.

Even more important, we all know that parents are the prime teachers of their offspring. Studies show over and over again, that there are no persons more influential to a child’s value system or behavior than his parents. Yes, school teachers are extremely important, but they are far behind good old Mom and Dad. Having only one parent is definitely a disadvantage to young people so why should anyone purposely take away one or both of a child’s mentors, educators and confidants.

But for me, I would miss my kids too much to let them live any where without me! I know that sounds selfish, but we dads need to be selfish with our offspring. They count on us! We need to be there! And, life is short!

Think about it and you will realize that taking the kids along on every move, even when they “don’t want to go”, is in their best interest.

PS, No, I’m not finding fault with our new president, but I think he didn’t spend enough time on this one!