How to keep a post-prom party from going wrong while making sure everyone has a good time.

Ready to party?Spring brings forth proms, and proms suggest post-prom parties, and post-prom parties often cause major parental anxiety, or at least they should! But it doesn’t have to be that way! Below are some ideas two high school kids used to make their post-prom party happy, safe, and more fun!

Let’s go back to 2010 when one of my grandsons and his girlfriend wanted to host a party. His parents asked him first to decide what the rules of conduct would be. If the parents agreed with the rules, he would be allowed to have the party. With his permission and that of his parents I submit his guidelines for what turned out to be a great party.

He and his girlfriend, both high school juniors, wrote the following rules to govern conduct at the party and had them approved by his parents. (Which is the way I think house rules should be decided.) He and she also decided what the punishment would be for an infraction of the rules.

The invitation below is exactly as he sent it via e-mail.

Hey, guys, in case I haven’t told you yet, you’re invited to an after-prom party at my house! My mom just wants to make sure that everyone knows some ground rules. If you are to attend, please email her at XXXXXXXX.net with a confirmation that you understand and agree to these rules.

Rules and Regulations for the After-prom Party:

“Because we care about you…”

1. All rules and regulations enumerated herein have been agreed upon by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX (Parents), and all attendees of the after-party must abide by the following or parents will be notified to collect the offending person(s).

2. No non-prescription drugs, stimulants, depressants, hallucinogens, alcohol, tobacco, club drugs, inhalants, mushrooms, narcotics, etc. are allowed. Mr. and Mrs. XXXXX (Parents) will be sleeping in the hallway/staircase region to prevent “purple” rooms.

5. No intense intimate relations. Mr. XXXXXXXX ( Dad) defines intimate as “anything more than a chaste kiss. Leave room for the Holy Spirit.”

6. All guests must depart by 9:00 a.m. (to be changed?).

7. After the party, all guests must help to clean up (spills, trash, messes, etc.).

8. All guests must stay within the presence of others, and nobody/no small groups of people are allowed outside unless all are willing to go outside. House alarms will be set upon the group’s arrival from prom.

9. Do not do anything that you do not want Mr. XXXXXXXX(Dad) to put pictures of on Facebook.

10. Be nice, no drama please.

11. If you wish to bring a movie(s), it(they) must be rated G, PG, or PG-13. All other movies will be confiscated.

12. If you wish to bring video games, they must be EC, E, E10+, or T. All other video games will be confiscated. If one wishes to bring a video game system(s), that (those), too, is (are) allowed.

13. Music considered offensive by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX is not allowed either. If you would not go up to them and speak the lyrics to them conversationally, do not play that song.

14. Forbidden activities include Laptag, Spin the Bottle, Truth or Dare?, etc. Other activities can be forbidden on the spot by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX

15. The 10 Commandments are in effect at all times. A list of these is posted in the kitchen to aid anyone who might not understand them completely.”

Some 14 couples came and I was told by my son and grandson that no one was asked to leave and everybody had a great time.

If you are sorry your kids were not invited to a party of this kind, let them plan their own party. Just copy my grandson’s rules and have a great time. Guaranteed!

Lest you think Eric is a geek, let me assure you he is not. At that time he had one of the top GPA’s in his class, played in the marching band, was an Eagle Scout, had a black belt in karate, and was the kind of guy you would want your sons to have as a friend, and your daughter to date. He has since written a perfect 36 on the ACT, graduated first in his HS class, graduated with honors from Notre Dame, is currently studying in Germany on a Fulbright scholarship, and this summer will enter Vanderbilt University  Medical School. Mary and I, like his parents, are so proud of him.